fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize