I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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