Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
