I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
Randomize