seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Randomize
