Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize
