haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
Randomize