if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Randomize