32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week đ
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
I feel kind of like weâre in a gang and tonight is one of those âpeople are gonna know not to fuck with usâ type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. Iâm not really sure how I got to this point in my life⊠but I like it.
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