So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize
