You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
Randomize
