no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
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So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
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Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.