Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
These 29 Nasty People Went To The Bathroom In Public
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.