Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Randomize
