i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
I got a black eye last night. This guy said for every 35 pounds you lose you gain an inch to your dick. I asked him how long he has been peeing sitting down.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
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