PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
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