Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
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