i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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