Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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