i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
Randomize
