Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
Randomize
