Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
You did what with his pubic hair?
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