I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
Randomize
