i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize
