Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
I murdered the dance floor call the cops
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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