Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
