What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
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