the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
home. puking in laundry basket.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
I have surprise drugs for everyone
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Randomize
