So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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