why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Randomize
