called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
Randomize
