Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
Randomize
