No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Randomize
