Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize
