I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
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