did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
Randomize
