if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
Your dad touched me again.
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
Randomize