im about as happy as oj after his trial
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Randomize
