Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
