Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
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