Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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