Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
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