the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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