Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
Ladies don't puke and tell
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
Randomize
