tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
