Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
how do you play pong handcuffed?
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Randomize
