Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
Randomize
