By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
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