So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
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