So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
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