So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
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